Saturday, October 8, 2011

Widow Warm-Ups

Ps 119:105 "Your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path"

One of the most difficult issues for me through which I have had to navigate is the "me" vs. the "we." Everything changed when I became a solitary in a world of couples. Let me explain further; Gene passed away and my somewhat structured world was rocked. Social aspects were impacted immensely. My frame of reference was geared toward couples and family gatherings for my social interaction. All of a sudden that was thrown upside down and both my body and my mind could not relate. I felt like a foreigner. That "third wheel" syndrome that people speak about came true for me. I no longer felt the same comfort level around those friends that were married. In my mind (perception), I saw them as ideally happy, content and having "everything." I quickly isolated myself and shut down some of the communication between us feeling very uncomfortable in "their world." This type of mindset still gets to me sometimes but God has shown me that it's not that my married friends have changed, but it is I that have put this limit on myself.

Here's a suggestion how to remedy this situation, humanly speaking, seek out others that are widowed. Join a group at your church. Become part of another kind of "we." There are many ways to become socially involved without being coupled up. If you notice a neighbor that is alone, take time to connect and communicate. Invite a long time friend over for lunch or tea. If someone is alone in the hospital, take time to visit them. Remember someone on their birthday with a card and a hug. There are numerous ways to "reach out."

A handy item is calling cards (much like business cards). These include your email address, name and phone number, they are a wonderful tool for introducing yourself to others. So many times hand-written pieces of paper get misplaced along the way, but cards can be stashed in your purse or wallet. The calling cards come in various formats, decor and are customized to your liking. Here are a couple of places online that you can check out for calling cards --

https://www.colorfulimages.com/
http://www.victoriantradingco.com/

Remember, you are NOT ALONE -- In Him is your freedom, peace and joy -- think on these things as your "widow warm-ups" each day!

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