Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Help! I am caught in the fast lane!

Did you ever feel like you are caught in "the fast lane" and there is no exit? Life moves at an extremely fast pace these days -- for example, challenged technologically sometimes, I am barraged by ads for "the fastest", "the best", and "the newest" gizmos, gadgets and wonders that are tauted as "must haves!" I don't own an Iphone, Ipad, Ipod or none of those I's! Besides their price .... I just don't seem to be interested in every bell and whistle that comes along....I love email and Facebook and social networking is my "friend." hehe! I love face-to-face or voice-to-voice conversation! Also, the written word is powerful! Texting has messed up my spelling (but that's another blog topic) LOL! I love to text except my fingers get fatigued :)

I worked for seven years on a computer helpdesk and was well over fifty when I took the job. It isn't over til it's over! I really fought myself and the attitude of incompetence for the first few months....the months turned into years and I still had a wall of post-its....cheat sheets and co-workers that I depended on when my memory was hiding too many facts below the top level of my brain! Recalling that the first few months, I came home everyday and cried and poured out my heart to God. He heard me and I was able to function and even RETIRE from that job successfully because I gave it everything I had and listened to not be discouraged!

I often asked, "Am I not able to perform what is asked of me?"

Performance was imprinted in my DNA. From the time I was little, I remember having to take lessons for everything from baton twirling and piano, to tap and ballet. It wasn't that I was trying to find my "niche" (I didn't even know what that word meant). It was that my mother and father wanted me to "be somebody." Wait a minute, I thought I WAS SOMEBODY!

There is a basket that appears in our brains that should read, "Please fill with ideas of who I should become and who I should NOT become" My basket was full of doubt, unworthiness and inadequacy. Everything I was forced to try didn't always produce a good result or a "famous" celebrity. My mother was all about celebrities. She based who you were by who KNEW "Who you were!"

I was shown through much effort and prayer what gifts I did possess and after several years of perseverance, I was able to hone them, use them and hopefully, encourage others with them! Working with senior citizens has been bittersweet. I've lost many of those dear sweet ladies just because of their demographic and health issues. I've helped many widows and even started a writing project which I hope to complete soon.

Single people whether by choice or not, divorce or widowed, have something very much in common -- Christ is our head....our leader -- embracing this has taken me a long time! I thought you had to have it all! Mate, fancy cars, houses and a healthy bank account. But God has shown me that He is my source for everything I need! He is my rock and salvation, my provider!

There is only one Person that can show me WHO I AM...and that is Christ! He got me out of the fast lane and said, "slow down" and listen to Me! I am your GPS and your conscience and your Guide! Stick with me and I will never steer you in the wrong direction.

At this time, I still get thrown into a cycle of doubt, depression and stress, but I call on the One who loves me (a DAUGHTER of THE KING)....He has guided my path way back when I didn't know a grapevine step from a shuffle-ball-change (dance terms)...

Dance through life, laugh often and share your gifts and talents with friends and family -- God gave us purpose, meaning and a definite reason for living -- Glorify Him and enjoy Him forever! closing, if you end up in the fast lane of confusion or doubt, God allows you to make a u-turn and start over again!

Psalm 46:1 "God is our refuge and strength -- a very present help in trouble..."

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